The Phantom of the Library

As if I don't suffer enough little indignities each day in my job...

A woman came in today to pick up a hold. It was the DVD "Phantom of the Opera" with Lon Cheney. When she saw the DVD, she started freaking out.

"Why do you people keep doing this to us?!! We don't want the Lon Cheney version. We want the tv miniseries with Burt Lancaster. And Teri Polo. And Charles Dance."

I looked up the version that she wanted and noticed that it was currently on order for the library. And that this woman was on the wait list. I told her that we had ordered it and that she was first in line for it but that it hadn't come in yet.

"That's a lie! You are just not telling the truth! We have been waiting for this movie SINCE NOVEMBER!!! You're just lying to me."

Like I would lie about something as serious as Phantom of the Opera with Charles Dance.

So finally, I told her, "Well, you can either wait for this version to come in or, if you really need it, you try and find it at Blockbuster."

She gave me a withering look and yelled, "I'm not going to PAY for a video!"

And then she stormed off as I said, "Well, I guess it's not that important, huh?"

I hate being yelled at for irrational reasons. After this unsettling altercation, I decided there was only one thing to do. I put the LON CHENEY version BACK on hold for her. I can't wait to see her face when it comes in AGAIN. Maybe it will finally push her into madness. I picture her roaming the basement of the library with her face covered in genre stickers, haunting us all with her singing and organ playing.